A quarter-life crisis is a term describing a period of emotional upheaval and self-reflection often experienced by individuals between the ages of 20 and 30. During this transitional stage, young adults frequently grapple with feelings of uncertainty, anxiety, and stress regarding their future, career, and personal identity. According to life coach Lisa Robinson, this phase is often intensified by societal pressures that push young adults to achieve specific milestones, leaving them questioning their own paths.
This stage commonly involves reflecting on past decisions and confronting self-doubt. As Robinson states, young adults may feel overwhelmed by the many possibilities ahead, including career choices, relationships, and personal goals. Societal narratives that equate early achievements with success often amplify these pressures, making it easy for individuals to feel “behind” or inadequate.
Understanding that a quarter-life crisis is a normal developmental phase can be empowering. In the words of author William Bridges, recognizing these challenges as shared experiences allows individuals to approach them with curiosity rather than fear. Awareness becomes the first step toward navigating uncertainty and building resilience during this transformative period.
Quarter-Life Crisis Signs
Entering adulthood presents many challenges, and the quarter-life crisis is one critical stage. Recognizing the signs can help young adults understand their experiences and seek strategies for positive change.
1. A Sense of Stagnation
Lisa Robinson explains that many young adults feel “stuck in a rut,” going through life without purpose or direction. Career dissatisfaction or lack of personal growth often intensifies this feeling, leaving individuals frustrated and disengaged.
2. Increased Self-Doubt
According to Bridges, self-doubt is a hallmark of the quarter-life crisis. Young adults frequently question their abilities, choices, and future paths, often comparing themselves to peers. Societal pressures to achieve career success or financial stability can amplify these doubts, creating cycles of uncertainty and anxiety.
3. Dissatisfaction with Life Choices
Robinson states that many individuals feel misaligned with their careers or lifestyles. This dissatisfaction often prompts reevaluation of professional and personal trajectories, sometimes leading to drastic decisions like changing careers or relocating in search of fulfillment.
4. Fear of Commitment
Fear of making long-term decisions, whether in relationships or careers, is common. In the words of Bridges, young adults often hesitate to fully invest in commitments due to the worry that they might regret their choices in the future.
Related: 15 Effective Ways To Overcome Life Challenges
5. Changes in Lifestyle
Sudden shifts in routines, friendships, or residence often reflect the search for identity during a quarter-life crisis. Robinson notes that these changes are a natural attempt to redefine oneself during uncertain times.
6. Need for Constant Validation
According to Bridges, individuals experiencing a quarter-life crisis may seek external approval more than usual, often measuring success by comparing themselves to others.
7. Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
Robinson explains that a sense of urgency and anxiety about missing opportunities or experiences is common during this stage, leading to stress and self-criticism.
8. Difficulty Making Decisions
Decision-making can feel overwhelming. In Bridges’ words, the pressure to make the “right” choice can create paralysis, leaving individuals stuck and indecisive.
9. Loss of Interest in Hobbies
A quarter-life crisis can sap motivation for activities that were once enjoyable, reflecting emotional strain.
10. Increased Anxiety and Stress
Robinson notes that existential anxiety often arises as individuals ponder their purpose and place in the world, leading to stress, restlessness, and low self-esteem.
11. Changes in Sleep Patterns
Sleep disturbances, such as difficulty falling asleep or waking up fatigued, are frequent during this crisis.
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12. Despair
Bridges states that despair may occur when young adults feel directionless and disconnected from peers. Feelings of hopelessness, sadness, and inadequacy can deepen the emotional toll and affect relationships
Triggers of a Quarter-Life Crisis
One of the biggest triggers for having a quarter-life crisis is transition periods and external expectations. Robinson points out that job instability can cause young adults to panic and experience insecurity. Whether they recently got a job they aren’t great at or lost their source of income, the feeling of not being good enough or scared of what’s to come next is normal.
Recently graduating is another triggering event that can cause students to worry about the future. Bridges states that going from a structured college life to the “real world” can be scary. Feeling pressure to have your life together and find a rewarding job while watching your friends do so can trigger high levels of stress.
External pressures from society can also be triggering. As Robinson says, “Society can make you feel like you need to be married with a puppy and a picket fence by age 25.” Of course, this may not apply to everyone but feeling like you need to meet certain expectations by a particular age can cause you to feel lonely or depressed if those aspects aren’t what you want for yourself.
Understanding the triggers of your quarter life crisis can allow you to recognize what you’re feeling and deal with the situation rather than letting the situation control you.
Impact of Social Media on Perception of Success
Social media has created a trend where people only showcase the best parts of their life. Bridges tells us that because of apps like Instagram and TikTok, it’s easy for people to compare themselves to others and feel inadequate. Social media can also cause higher levels of anxiety and depression when going through a quarter-life crisis.
Robinson explains that when people compare themselves to their friends’ success, they may feel as if there is something wrong with them for not having their life together. Everyone struggles with different things in life, but when social media is introduced, it’s easy to think that everyone else has it figured out and you don’t. Comparing yourself to others can lead to increased feelings of stress, lack of progress, and FOMO.
To overcome this issue, Bridges recommends teaching young adults about how social media can be misleading. Let them know that there is always more to someone’s story than what they post on social media. Remind your child that everyone feels like they aren’t where they want to be in life.
Coping Mechanisms and Helpful Tips
Going through a quarter life crisis is scary, but there are many ways to deal with the anxiety you may experience.
First, you should talk to a therapist or counselor. Robinson recommends going to therapy to have a safe space to vent about your uncertainties and talk to someone who can help you through your situation. Therapy can help you understand your feelings and provide you with ways to deal with them in a productive manner.
Journaling or practicing mindfulness can also be very beneficial when looking for coping mechanisms. As stated by Bridges, writing down your thoughts or practicing mindfulness can help you understand what you value, what you want in life, and where you may be feeling upset. Once you know what you’re feeling, you can set goals and take steps to reach them.
Setting goals can help you feel less anxious and stuck. Robinson says that when you feel like you are not where you want to be in life, try setting small goals that will lead you to your larger ones. This will help you feel like you are not constantly stressing about the big picture.
Building healthy relationships with others can also help you through your quarter life crisis. Not only will you have people to talk to about your feelings, but you will be less lonely which can help with depression and anxiety.
Last but not least, try practicing mindfulness and or self-care when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Meditation, yoga, and deep-breathing exercises are all ways that can help you stay present and clear your mind. Staying in the present can help you deal with feelings of uncertainty.
Conclusion
Quarter-life crises are difficult, but understanding what you are feeling can help you better overcome these feelings. Robinson tells us that “a quarter-life crisis can cause you to feel unhappy, anxious, stressed, and depressed.” However, if you know why you feel that way and understand that what you’re feeling is normal, you can use the tips above to help you better deal with your feelings.
Not only will this allow you to enjoy your 20’s more, but you will come out of this feeling stronger and more confident in your decision making. Quarter life crises are tough, but remember that almost everyone experiences them.
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